Counseling Made Me Realize How I Can Be A Good Father To My Son 

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 Crossing the bridge into fatherhood spans a life stage where both King roles (as Provider, Rule Maker, Protector) and Lover roles (as Birth Coach, Intimate Partner, Co-Caregiver) carry less impact than before. There is a new game afoot. — Jonathan Bartlett, MA, MFT

Fatherhood is not an easy place to be in, and it’s not something you can leave when it gets hard. I have to admit I’m still in shock and new to this whole different world of being a dad. Unlike women who played pretend-to-be-mom growing up, I played cars and toy guns. It seemed like chaos was the ultimate fun! 

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5 Things We Limited In Our Home (That You Might Need To Limit In Yours, Too!)

Look at your family’s daily life carefully, and you’ll see that there’s a thing or two (or five!) you either have to set limits on or entirely cut off from your daily routine. I did this and came up with this list of five I believe my family should have boundaries from.

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5 Reasons Why Some Dads Prefer Daughters

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A woman fortunate enough to have had a good father is a woman as lucky as an heiress. Even if in his will, her father cannot leave her a dime, she accumulates riches vast and secure enough to help her through the toughest parts of life. — Gina Barreca Ph.D.

Some daddies, especially those who have experienced fathering both genders, say they enjoy being a daddy to a daughter. It doesn’t mean they love their sons less. It just means some things bring them a unique feeling and experience in raising their daughters. You can even see men on social media who may look and seem rough but are so gentle and loving to their daughters. Things like these make our hearts melt. So why is it that fathers tend to be more emotionally attached to their daughters?

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The Best Dad Movies To Watch

Whether it’s Father’s Day or you want to have a movie night with the whole family, you should try watching movies about dads. You’ll probably relate to the heartbreaking storylines and comedic father–children scenes.

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If you’re not familiar with this movie class, don’t worry too much because we got you covered. Listed below are some of the best dad movies you can watch with your loved ones.

Father Of The Bride (1991)

Father of the Bride is a remake of the famous 1950s movie called Vincent Minnelli’s. This film is a father-daughter classic, which tackles the issue of the daughter’s marriage.

Steve Martin is a clingy and overprotective dad who got jealous when his one and only daughter began spending most of her time with her fiancé. Since he’s not yet used to the fact that daddy’s little girl is all grown up, he goes a little bit nuts.

This movie is such a comedic delight, especially during the scene where the dad goes through a full wedding panic and breaks down at the grocery store.

He Got Game (1998)

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This pick is perfect for sports-loving fathers. In the story, Denzel Washington took on the role of a father who was trying to rebuild his relationship with his son, a top-rank basketball player. This yearning happened after spending around six years in prison.

It turns out the state governor only released him for seven days so that he can convince his famous son to play for the governor’s alma mater. If he succeeds in this conquest, the official promised a massive reduction in his prison sentence.

Morris From America (2016)

Morris From America is a delightful coming-of-age story starring Markees Christmas and Craig Robinson. Morris (Christmas) plays the role of a 13-year-old New Yorker who moved to Germany. This transition was a challenge for him because he had to come up with strategies to fit in. While his classmates are more inclined into dance music, Morris considers himself a rapper, always writing rhyming poems and songs.

Another challenge he faced during this time was the fact that his dad makes fun of his ambitions him all the time. Morris From America is a beautiful film to watch due to its perfect balance of comedy and drama.

Mrs. Doubtfire (1993)

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Mrs. Doubtfire started with a divorce finalization scene. Because of this unfortunate event, a loving father, portrayed by Robin Williams, drafted a wild plan so that he can see his children. He transformed himself with costume and makeup to pass for a nanny for the household. Everything was going well until he and his wife were both invited to a family dinner. This event put his secret at risk of exposure.

Although it has its comedic aspects, the film also touched on love, patience, and the sacrifice of a father.

These movies about dads and families will put a smile to everyone’s lips. It will also be more memorable if the whole family gets to watch these films with the number 1 guy in their lives.

Dads, Here Are 3 Signs You’re Doing A Great Job

A father’s greatest nightmare is being told they’re doing a poor job at raising their little humans. They already get a bad reputation for being the less involved parent as it is.

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Being a father is no easy task; there are lots of things to remember that you might not get a grip on everything. But don’t be so discouraged. Your relationship with your kids is probably healthier than you think. To check, look out for these signs!

The term “good enough” implies a kind of parenting that sets the stage for child development without micromanaging the entire process. The idea behind it is that growth is an internal drive unique to the nature of each child. — Jonathan Bartlett, MA, MFT

Your Kids Are Not Afraid Of Telling You Things

You communicate with each other. You find that you can easily confide simple things to them as if they are your pals. In the same way, they also update you about what’s happening with their lives. When they experience any stress or discomfort, they run to you for advice. You realize that hearing your help is crucial before they make any decisions. You are not a stranger to them, and you know this because you rest in confidence that you know what’s going on with your kids. You know how they’re doing at school and their extra-curricular or if they have any crush—everything under the sun.

They tell you things simply because you are a great listener. When they share their experiences with you, you offer the best advice you can give. You act not only as their dad but also as their best friend—and that’s a great trait to have.

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Fathers spend a higher percentage of their one-to-one interactions with infants and preschoolers in stimulating, playful activity than do mothers. From these interactions, children learn how to regulate their feelings and behavior. — Ditta M. Oliker Ph.D.

They Are Kind

Their kindness to you and other people is very apparent. They are selfless and thrive on doing things for other people. Still, they remain headstrong and brave. Your kids know how to stand up for themselves and for other people. Your kids are compassionate and empathic. You find that they handle conflict well, and they know when to apologize. They are aware of when they have hurt others’ feelings and are mature enough to approach you if you have hurt theirs. Overall, they are just great humans who are emotionally intelligent with a brave heart.

They learned this by watching you. You have become a fantastic role model for your kids that they know your kindness is something noble enough to embody on their own.

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A research study of school-aged children found children with good relationships with their fathers had lower incidence of depression, disruptive behavior, and lying. This study also found that boys with involved fathers had fewer school behavior problems and that girls with such fathers had higher self-esteem. — Melanie Greenberg Ph.D.

They Make You Proud

Our kids tell a lot about how we have raised them. In most cases, they turn out mostly as a carbon copy of us even when they are unconscious of it. They take on our traits and our values, and they merge it with their own experiences.

You know you have done an excellent job as a dad when seeing them be the way they are makes your heart burst with pride. Ultimately, you are satisfied with the thought that you have raised them well. You rest easy knowing that your kids are on the right path and that, despite your flaws, you have still done an excellent job.

There is no single method on how to be a better dad. As always, it remains to be a case-to-case basis depending on the relationship dynamics of a particular family. If you feel like you are still doing worse than you aim, don’t give up. You have every single day to try again with your kids. Until you find the approach that best suits you, don’t be so hard on yourself. Here’s to being a better dad!

Words Of Wisdom From Dads That Are Pure Gold

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Therapists are known to cater to a lot of depressed individuals across the globe. Some of them feel helpless because their boyfriend or girlfriend left them for the third party. Others cannot get over the death of someone they love of the loss of their dream job. Thus, the most practical solution that comes to mind is to employ the help of mental health professional

Of course, there is nothing odd or wrong about this decision. If you are ill, you go to the doctor. If you have psychological issues, it is only natural to think of consulting a licensed therapist about how you can overcome it. They are the experts in this field; they are supposed to know how to help you.

Nevertheless, I know that the number of individuals who go to mental health professionals does not cover the real total of depressed people across the globe. Many refuse to visit a therapist’s clinic as they fear of getting criticized or feeling invalidated. Others prefer to try to get over their problems on their own, even though they know their chances seem bleak.

While mothers (typically) introduce children to the world of relationships, fathers introduce them to the world. — Karen L Smith MSS, LCSW

Considering your case is closer to the latter than the former, you should talk to your daddy or any man who plays that role in your life. The reason is that fathers can be brutally honest whenever they give their opinion, especially if the concerned individual is their kids. You may or may not disclose the details of your depression to your dad, but I am sure that he can share some of his words of wisdom to you that are pure gold.

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Some of the common enlightening comments that fathers offer can be found below.

If The Shoes Don’t Fit, Stop Forcing It

Some women have a hard time accepting that the man they love does not love them back, and vice versa. The former keep on texting or calling the latter, hoping that their mind will change at one point. Alternatively, they believe that the indirect harassment will annoy the love of their life, to the extent that the individual will agree on going on a date with them. So, if it doesn’t happen in reality, the romantic becomes hopeless and goes into depression.

Engulfment: This occurs when a child is not encouraged to separate and individuate from the mother in early childhood. As an adult, the engulfed child becomes an adult obsessed with relationships, demanding others meet all their needs without taking responsibility for meeting their own needs. — Amy Quinn, MA, MS, LMFT

What most dads can advise in this situation is to stop forcing yourself on people who are not into you. If someone does not like you, that’s fine. You will be able to find others who will want to bring you the moon and the stars even if you don’t ask. It is such a waste of time to keep on devoting your efforts on people who do not appreciate you.

There’s No Point In Crying Over Someone Who Has Already Hurt You

The first thing that my father has honestly told me one day he saw me crying after a bad breakup was, “Dry up your tears. You only cry over someone who has loved you.” At that moment, I wanted to argue that he was wrong, that he did not even know what happened. I was thinking, “How could he be so mean?”

But then, my dad made me realize that my ex would not have hurt me if he loved me for real. No man or woman in love could bear the sight of their partner being in pain because of them, after all. That short interaction with my father has allowed me to see that, yes, there’s no point in shedding tears over someone who does not mind hurting me. No one has the right to do that, no matter how much you love that person. It’s something you should remember as well.

When children are autonomous, they are more likely to feel capable of making their own healthy choices. — Eva Lazar, PhD

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The World Doesn’t Stop Revolving Even If Your Partner Leaves You

There are people, men, and women alike, who take a split so hard, to the point that they no longer want to go out or do anything else. They don’t eat or shower; they cannot even be bothered to charge their phones just in case someone wants to check up on them. It is as if their life is on a standstill, and everything will only return to normal if their partner takes them back.

The truth is, it seems rare for exes to find love in each other’s arms again, especially if you have broken up because your partner has found another person to love. Despite that, it does not mean that you cannot move on from it. You can fall for someone new again, someone better. Your world should not stop revolving just because the love of your life has left you.

In The End

I am aware that such words of wisdom may not make sense to you immediately, primarily if you are still in the grieving stage. However, keep them in your mind and talk to your dad more. Who knows, he may be able to share more of his know-how about how you should handle different situations in life.

Good luck!